Thursday, December 11, 2008


For all of those who call me stupid and dumb when it comes to flirting, this is why I choose not to.

"Meet Mr. Smith," Paragraph written my Leslie Ludy

In modern relationships, flirting seems about as innocent and harmless as window shopping at the mall. "Whats the hard of browsing, as long as you don't actually buy anything?" a young man named Chris jokingly asked during a discussion on the topic.

Even young people who have chosen God's pattern for relationships and are seeking to live a set-apart life for their future spouse often shrug off flirting as a natural part of any male/female interaction. But take a closer look at what flirting really is, and it becomes clear that some important principles in God's pattern are violated by doing it

Flirting is, in essence, drawing another person's attention toward you. it is, using your feminine power to entice another person to notice, admire, and be attracted to you. It is putting your personality, body, humor, and wit on display- playing a game in which you score more points the most positive attention you recieve from the other person.

Flirting, at its core, is based on selfishness.

If Eric flirted with other women, I would be hurt, jealous, and angry. If I flirted with other men, he would feel outraged and betrayed. We are in a covenant marriage relationship and have pledged to have eyes only for each other. I belong to Eric- mind, body, and heart. And he belongs to me. We honor each other by keeping our attention sacred- reserved for our spouse alone. Most would agree that this is the way it should be.

If then, as a married person you would not dishonor or hurt your spouse by flirting with anyone else, why would you hurt your future spouse now by flirting with others before marriage? As you interact with guys(girls), ask yourself this question: If your future spouse was standing beside you, seeing you interact with the opposite sex, how would he(she) feel? Once you ask that question and answer honestly, flirting no longer becomes a harmless, innocent activity.

The goal in any God centered relationship should be to continually point the other person towards Christ, not continually draw attention toward you.

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